Rant, anyone?

The other night I was watching a new show that I enjoy called Franklin and Bash (What?! Me watching tv?! Cheesy, bad tv?! Imagine that.). Franklin and Bash are two "hip and cool", "up and coming", fight for the little guy lawyers who have just been hired into a firm full of stuffy, no fun havin, follow the rules, bring in the big bucks lawyers who have a kookie boss who likes to shake things up. (I smell highjinks.) We know Frannklin and Bash are the hip ones because they play COD, wear board shorts in the office and use phrases in the courtroom like "tap that". Textbook hip lawyer stuff. Franklin and Bash are played by Mark Paul Gosselaar and Breckin Meyer. AKA Zach Morris and that skater dude from Clueless who loved little Brittany Murphy and her drawings of Marvin the Martian just the way they were. You know, before she was all "Rollin with the homies".

Anyway, F&B were going to be trying the case of a girl who claimed she was fired from her job for being too beautiful and therefore too much of a distraction in the office. After being briefed on the details of the case they head to the lobby to meet said beautiful girl. Now, because of years spent watching after-school specials and Saved By The Bell I knew to expect a poor misguided, delusional "unpretty" girl waiting for them in the lobby. The typical poor ugly duckling that hollywood usually portrays by gussying a girl down with ill fitting clothing, massively thick glasses, terribly frizzy and unruly hair (sometimes a ponytail) and maybe a few giant zits to top it off. But to my surprise the girl turned around and she actually was beautiful! No zits, no ill fitting clothing, no frizzy hair, no bad glasses...What?! I did not see that coming. And to top it all off she was sweet, likable and good at her job.

Now, to try and paint a better picture here I'm going to do something that is going to cause me to be annoyed with myself and that is to say that she was not what I perceive the general population has deemed beautiful. Meaning she was not a size 00 (size 2 is no longer skinny enough. Now your clothing has to be made by elves and fairies who use thimbles as a guidline for waist circumference), there were no DD's in effect and her legs were not perfectly sculpted, smooth stilts. But let me tell you, she was beautiful.

So this is where I got annoyed. F&B excused themselves to go discuss her appearance with a colleague and said that the case was a lost cause because the client was in fact, not beautiful, not pretty and, get this, "not even last call in Alaska pretty". What the hell F&B?! I thought you were my boyz (that's right, boyz with a Z sucka). It was at this point that I paused TiVo (I love you TiVo) and took a minute to gripe to Jim about all this... and now I'm griping to you about all of this... whoever "you" are... is...

Seriously, I know this is nothing new and people have ranted and raved about this for a very long time but this girl was beautiful and they are flat out calling her ugly. It's like the bar for beauty keeps getting raised and unfortunately most of us girls do care at least a little bit about being able to reach that stupid bar. Now, we're not striving to do chin-ups on the bar but we at least want to have a chance to attempt a chin-up and then dangle there awkwardly when we don't make it.

At least when tv shows used to use an "ugly" girl they made an attempt to make the "ugly" girl look like maybe she wasn't having the best hair, skin, clothing day. And even hearing me say (write) that annoys me. That there is even a standard for what would make someone appear ugly. Why do frizzy hair, bad clothes and a not so great complexion have to be deemed ugly? I know my life would be a whole lot easier if hairy legs, zits and frizzy hair were in. I'm just sayin, I may have cured cancer or solved world hunger if I wasn't spending so much time shaving, plucking, exfoliating and straightening.

I'm not saying that I'm never guilty of being judgmental, of course I am. We all are. I just hate it. That's it. I hate judgeyness. I hate it when I see it in myself and I hate when I see someone being negatively affected by someone else's assessment of them. That's all.

Oh yeah, cause I know you(re) all dying to know. In the end F&B realized that once they got to know their client they really liked her and they decided that they were going to find a way to win the case for her. Not because they thought she was beautiful but because she truly believed that she herself was beautiful. Kind of feels like a back handed compliment but whatever. I'll totally watch it again next week, ugh.